Knowing when to SHUT UP!

It's difficult to watch. I mean when children (or anyone for that matter) are starting to learn about independence of thought and personality. It's when they begin to decide just who they are and try to voice their opinions and ideals. It is often like watching a really bad movie hoping it will get better as it goes along.
I have the experience of watching that process more often than not. Because of the fact that I am with children a LOT, I am seeing them develop and find it interesting that they are, in some ways like puppies and in other ways like Pit Bulls. (can you tell that I am listening to Cesar's Way, he's a dog psychologist, on tape? But that's another story)
They are like puppies in that they play rough 'n tumble with the rough getting rougher until someone gets hurt and then it's Pit Bull time. I hate that part but it happens every time. That sort of thing can often be headed off at the pass but it's the "open mouth-insert foot" syndrome that is the problem.
Take yesterday for example. As you know Devon just turned ten. He is a bundle of testosterone and energy and most of it is in his mouth. He loves to talk, hear himself talk, and it seems that talking is his favorite hobby. After all, he has been talking since he was 10 months old and...well...hasn't stopped. We have discussed that he could be a preacher or a politician but again I digress.
We were getting ready for school and there was a small conflict between Devon and his little sister Mikeala. She wanted to borrow his markers and he didn't want to lend them. I tried to talk to him about the whole sharing thing but he wasn't budging. He was smart mouthing. I said that I liked to share things, like my pool for example and he said, "So?"
He was testing the waters. He was trying to be "grown up". The conversation began to escalate between us, me trying to get him to lend his markers and him progressively turning on the mouth. His mother was listening all of this while she was getting ready for work. Finally he went too far. He said he didn't care if he didn't swim in the pool, that he didn't need it and the "W" word came out.
"Whatever"
At this point his mother says in a very matter of fact tone "you are grounded from the pool today and the video games too."
The look on his face absolutely broke my heart. He probably thought he was asserting himself in a manly way and now he was grounded. I could see him asking himself "What just happened?"
I was thinking he just needed to stop talking! Just shut-up! Don't make it worse! BE QUIET!!
In the end, after a long conversation with his mom on behaviour and watching his mouth he was able to go swimming. I kind of pulled the Bubbie card. Thanks Liz!
They're learning. And it's hard.
They will get it in the long run, they'll just have to go through some very difficults times to get there and we'll all work on it together.
One thing stands sure though, puppies or Pit Bulls, they are all still beautiful to me.